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Today I met someone at the library that was struggling with a paper, we started talking and I could see he was expending a lot of energy going in several different directions and was stressing himself out.  I listened to the instructions for the paper and then said – find journal articles (required) and search for those keywords she listed.  And I continued – write the paper she wants, not the one you want.  Everything becomes much clearer when you realize the instructions are all there – just follow them.

Later I realized that the recommendation I gave him about writing his paper is good for almost everything in life.  It’s not about doing the right thing, it’s about doing what the other party wants – your boss, your partner, your teacher – yep, pretty much everyone.

I remember being in school and being disappointed when a teacher didn’t love all the great research I did, or the creative presentation because they only wanted a small portion of what I turned in (I love research and innovation, I have almost always over delivered!).  I always did well, but it was a hard lesson to learn.

Other people may not be impressed with your newfound passion for a project or event, but don’t give up your enthusiasm, instead, give them what they want and do your own project for YOU and share it with others who do appreciate the knowledge transfer!

 

I have always thought something was missing in my work life.  I spent many years negotiating lease agreements with attorneys, which is a given adversarial situation.  I did this five (5) days a week for years.  It hadn’t taken me long to become bored by the process, but I had to pay the bills right?  Yes, I did negotiate leases with well-known retailers and restaurants across the U.S.  I got to travel and meet incredible people and yes, the pay was good.  BUT, to spend every day with the same document and constantly on the defensive was exhausting.  Even though I met great lawyers that actually made the process somewhat fun, the fact of the matter was - we were on different sides. I was proud of a statement one made when I left a job – he described me as “no-nonsense, courteous (and often amusing).” I tried.

Every time I tried to move away from the individual role into a group role I was lured back to negotiation.  “You are so good at it”, “You are in a great niche”,  “I wish I could do that”.  Those kinds of comments along with a good salary pulled me back in repeatedly. Then I had an opportunity to work in a different industry – telecommunications and guess what?  The lease was shorter, but exactly the same!  I was disappointed, but it was a more collaborative environment than I had worked in before.  I loved it.  I love being involved.  I like to be a part of something.

Given a taste of being part of a team I was hooked. There is something so energizing about working with other people on a common goal for me.  I had always known this on a subconscious level – the movie “Heartbreak Ridge” hit me hard – because they were a team.  In fact, I joined the Air Force because of that movie (that’s another post – I didn’t end up going – and why??? They changed my job to a Security Specialist (guarding airplanes for 13-hour shifts) - a solitary position – how did I know then, at 19, more than I know now? – Wow, sounds like another post!)

When I was getting my Master’s degree I loved the group projects.  What I usually hated in undergraduate work became an awesome experience when everyone was engaged, as opposed to undergraduate work where many times people were flaky and I ended up doing all of the work!  I am sure many of you can identify with that.  I was sad when my degree ended and I wasn’t quite sure why until I finally realized it was the teamwork.

Recently I collaborated with a group of Coaches and I noticed the difference this time.  The days we weren’t working together I barely could get out of bed, I was lethargic and had no motivation.  But on the days I had calls with them, I was energized, excited, happy and motivated all day.  That project has ended for the most part and now I am on a quest to find a similar situation and a group to work with on their business.  I don’t want to basically “fill orders” any more; I want to work together for the common good.

I love to solve problems, brainstorm, technology, business plans and designing the customer experience.  I am also excited to be starting an Inspired Success Circle based on Tama Kieves Inspired & Unstoppable.  From Tama’s website:

There is so much power in community, shared commitments and intentions. Why not keep your enthusiasm and creativity alive and deepening? When two or more are gathered together, grace rushes in with twinkling eyes.  Support ends isolation. It’s isolation that often drains the colors out of our inspiration and ideas. Your dream deserves a stimulating network of people who each bring different gifts, experience and resources to the table.

Who might want to join a group? An Inspired Success Circle group works for those who are discovering their passion and authentic desires. And for those who are already doing the work they love or expressing their creativity, but want to take that success to the next level and rock the world…or at least rock their own!

The suggested format for the group would be to meet for 8 weeks with the first week being an introduction week, and then covering one chapter per week.

If you are interested in being a part of my Circle please e-mail me.  I plan on having a virtual offering through my Mastermind Business Group and an in-person group in San Jose, CA.  I look forward to meeting you!

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